Exciting Things to Talk About on First Date –
Tips for Single Moms
Things to talk about on first date can be challenging. Being a parent itself is challenging. But what is more challenging is being a single mom. Along with the parenting challenge, another struggle a single mom faces is to date again. When you are a single mom, your priorities, responsibilities, perspectives and needs are different from the times when you were just single.
You want to feel joy
You want to have fun, laugh uncontrollably, feel safe and maybe even on occasion be spontaneous. However, you cannot go out for too much enjoyment, because you just can’t feel lethargic as you have to take care of your little ones.
Having said that, you still have the needs and desires but you don’t know how to voice them or have them fulfilled. You don’t want to look as if you are weak, needy or desperate. Nor do you want to look like your bossy and aggressive.
Dating for single moms can be a difficult task. You don’t have time and energy to waste. Yes, you are a mom! But at the same time, you are a woman. A strong, desirable, vulnerable, respectful and adorable woman.
But when it comes to dating, you are not sure how to act, what to say in order to get your needs fulfilled. You don’t know how to compete in the perfect party filled dating world. You need to balance between being a mommy and being a woman.
So, for all you single moms out there, it doesn’t matter whether you chose to be a single mom or not. Here are some things to talk about on first date. Of course, each one of them takes confidence and you must be able to communicate them in a powerful feminine way.
So let’s get started – Things to Discuss on the First Date
Talk about yourself
You should talk about yourself, but ensure that you don’t boast a lot about yourself and make you look bossy or dominating. You should tell your partner about who you are as a person and what you are expecting from him.
You should be honest and truthful about yourself and should put up your true image in front of him instead of portraying something which you are not.
You should talk about your likes or dislikes. For example – Favorite pass time, favorite cuisine or favorite restaurant.
A particular habit that you don’t like and other things so that the person knows your true self. This is the easiest way to get into a conversation and remove the awkward silence between the two.
Talk about the commonalities
For a successful relationship, the most important thing is – there must be some similarities between couples. So, talk about what is common in you both. For that, you might ask some common questions. If the two of you have things in common, this increases the interest of both of you in each other.
Same taste in food, beverages, hobbies or other things can light up interests between you. The commonalities between the couples also make them more compatible and this is one of the best conversations you can have on your first date. So try and find commonalities and then there is something to talk about. Things don’t get so much awkward between you two.
Don’t hide the fact that you have kids – Talk about them
Being a single mom is not an easy task and it is not an embarrassment. Then why hide it? You are a single mom, a proud single mom and hiding this fact from your date makes you look weak.
As mentioned earlier, honesty is the key to the working of any relationship successfully. So, you should tell your date about your kids and talk about them. This is one of the finest ways to move forward with the conversation.
This will make your date feel that you are really interested in him and therefore, you are talking about your personal kinds of stuff with him. You should make it very clear, that your kids will be your priority always.
Having said that, you should ensure that your whole date doesn’t revolve around your kids. Don’t make your kids the focus. This conversation should be short and crisp as the person sitting there is interested in knowing more about you than about your kids. In depth details of your kids can come later when you decide if this relationship will prosper.
Talk about your lifestyle
The next thing a single mom should talk about in her first date is about her lifestyle. You should ensure that your date knows about your way of living. He should know about your living standards.
It is better to make things clear at this early stage. You should ensure that your date knows about your lifestyle and his lifestyle matches up to yours.
Even if it doesn’t match completely, then there should be some similarities, because it has been observed that people with two completely different lifestyles bond less. Keeps the conversation going so that they are comfortable in talking to you for a prolonged hour?
Talk about the other person
Being a single mom is difficult but if you keep on bragging about it, the other person loses interest in you. So the best way to keep the conversation going is to talk about your partner.
It is your duty to ask a lot of questions about him. This would also make him believe that you are actually interested in knowing about him. You might ask him to tell you something about himself.
You should ask about his likes or dislikes like favorite pass time, favorite cuisine or favorite restaurant or a particular habit that he does not like and other things so that you get to know the person.
When you get to know the person on your first date then you have a clear picture in your mind that whether he is worth your time and energy or not.
You should at the same time ensure that you are not being too clingy and should give the person their personal space. Don’t pester them to tell you something which they might not be very comfortable talking about on the very first date.
Things to Discuss on the First Date :
Talk about your kid’s daddy
After knowing your partner, if you feel that you are comfortable with your date and are ready to dig in a little deeper and provide him information, then talk about your ex briefly. If you think that you guys are getting on well and you can have a future together, then your date has every right to know about your kid’s father.
One thing you should remember while talking about your ex is that you don’t bad mouth about him.
Maybe you have a lot of frustration but this is not the right place or the right time to show it. If you are talking about your kid’s father, then just provide your date with a brief introduction about him and then change the topic.
Giving such personal details shall make your date feel that you are really very interested in him and it is one of the important things you can talk about on your first date.
By talking about your ex you climb one step up on the ladder of comfort and increase the chances of hooking up into a lasting relationship. But if you think that your date is just fooling around or if you are not comfortable in sharing this information on the first date you might skip this point.
Communicate about future dates
Now, this conversation is a personal preference. If you think that your first date was a successful one and you can go out with the same person on the next date, then you can talk about the future. You can discuss the next date or the next meet-up but ensure that you don’t take any decision hastily. If you feel that you don’t want to go on any future dates then please avoid this conversation.
We all know that being a single mom is very complicated as it requires a lot of your time and energy and dedication too. You are a mom but at the same time, you are a woman. You need to give a second chance to your love life.
You need romance in your life because your life would be dull without it. I know the thought of it might be daunting but still, you need to give it a try.
I hope this article was helpful in some way. There are a lot of things to chat about on first date. Depending on your level of comfort, you can share whatever details you like with your date.
Just a simple tip is to keep the conversations simple. Your life is already complicated, but don’t complicate your date. Keep the conversations positive and go with the flow. One thing leads to another sometimes; this could end up just being a future friend and still have companionship.
Things to Talk About on First Date :
It takes a very, extremely special man to accept kids from a previous relationship. Please take the journey slow. Find out if you, your new mate and your kids can become a new family together.
My Uncle married a lady with three little ones and they took it slow. The relationship turned out to be a very successful family! The kids grew up with their step father as a mentor. He provided the support of a husband and step dad for the entire family. Challenging at times, but my Uncle absolutely has no regrets.
He has wonderful love from his wife and three adorable children. He’s so proud that he has four people who love him dearly, not just one. He always stated “it was a package deal and what a deal”. He’s so fulfilled. The relationship is a wonderful blessing.
Please take your time, the right one is out there!
Happy – selective dating!